In reality, a lot of bisexual women are in relationships that look “straight”: More than 80% of them in committed relationships report having a partner of the opposite sex. (Which, as a reminder, doesn’t make them any less bi.) And a lot of trans people are in queer relationships that may appear heteronormative from the outside, too.

So, the next time you see what appears to be a straight couple at the gay bar, keep in mind that queer couples come in all different combinations. And they deserve to feel safe and welcome in LGBT spaces, no matter what their love looks like.